Friday, January 8, 2010

Miriam's Testimony

Hi!  My name is Miriam.  I grew up in a Christian home and we attended church EVERY Sunday with the rare exception of a weekend when there was a blizzard, causing church to be cancelled.  Even then we weren't off the hook, as our parents would then have a small "service" at home with just our family.  We also did a family devotional each evening after supper for most of the time I was growing up.  I really don't remember a particular occasion when I first accepted Jesus Christ as my personal Saviour.  I remember several occasions, for example at summer camp, when I would renew my desire to grow as a Christian and to learn and follow God's will.  Being a pretty relaxed and easy-going person, I've never been particularly ambitious or driven about any area of my life, and growing as a Christian wasn't any different.  I found it difficult to be diligent in doing personal devotions once I reached an age where I was old enough to be responsible for such an undertaking and allowed myself to believe that attending Sunday School, church, Bible study and youth group regularly were enough.  It was by attending these things during my teen years, as well as Bible camps and a few other Christian events, that my faith became my own, rather than a reflection of my parents' beliefs.

One particular time of great growth in my Christian life was a missions trip with Teen Missions International the summer I turned 17.  I went to Belize with a group of about 40 teenagers and 5 group leaders to build a church in a tiny community.  Daily devotions were scheduled as part of our days, as well as a group study and praise and worship.  This was one thing I can point to and say I most definitely saw God work to make this happen.  When I came across the brochure in a Christian teen magazine a missions trip was something that had never considered.  Not because it was something I wouldn't do, but because it just never occurred to me.  For some reason I went back to the brochure a couple of times, even after initially not paying much attention to it.  I prayed about it and I said to God "This is something I want to do.  If YOU want me to do it, then let the funding/support come in and if it doesn't then I will take that to mean that this is not Your will for me."  The funding came in.  And then some.  That trip is where I first learned how rewarding daily personal devotions can be - how much it changes your perspective and your attitude - but this was short-lived after returning home to my normal life and routines.

When I was 18 and had just graduated from high school, my parents and my three younger siblings moved to Germany, as my dad had signed on with Janz Team Ministries to do the Lord's work in what had once been East Germany.  This was a calling that was years in being fulfilled - my parents had felt led since before I was born to go to Germany as missionaries (my mother grew up in West Germany and only moved to Canada when she and my dad decided to get married) and it wasn't until I had graduated from high school that this worked out for them -- another area where I believe God's hand was at work, although the reason why may not be clear until we are one day in His presence.  When they moved to Germany, I moved to Winnipeg and started out attending church regularly with a really good Christian friend, but was soon distracted by activities with non-Christian friends, working shift-work that didn't allow me to attend church every week, and stopped personal devotions all together.  I spent more and more time with non-Christian friends.  I stopped attending church and didn't crack my Bible open for a long time.  I never stopped believing or lost my faith, but I stopped walking with God and didn't live my life with much thought for His will.  I felt guilty about some things, but guilt is not as great a motivator for living a Christian life as some seem to think it is.  During this time I dated, lived with, and then got married to a man who is not a Christian. 

When our first child was a baby I started attending a local church, as I've always wanted to raise my children to attend church and get to know God, and to become Christians themselves.  (My husband does nothing to deter this, although he has no interest in God or church himself.)  I do believe God led me to this church, quietly and gently.  I live in a community an hour away from where I grew up and was completely unfamiliar with the churches in the area.  One day as I was driving down Main Street, which I'd done thousands of times before, I noticed a small church that I'd seen before but never really looked at.  In smaller letters under the name of the church were the words "Mennonite Brethren" which is the same conference to which my parents' church belongs.  Familiarity!  A place to start, anyway.  We attended sporadically for the next two years for various reasons, but when John turned three and was old enough to attend Sunday School, I tried to attend as often as possible (although with also having a baby I tended to spend a lot of time in the nursery and really didn't benefit personally).  I think that was really when I started trying to find my way back.  I had started getting to know a few other women my own age at church who also had young children and we've become good friends.  I also started trying to start doing personal devotions regularly, although I've started and stopped so often in the past two years I've lost count.  Lately, however I've really been feeling the need to draw closer to God and really get to know Him and what His will is for me.  With the arrival of a new pastor this fall some new programs began in our church that had been missing for a while - one being a weekly Bible study with the friends I've made at church plus a couple of other women (with childcare provided) and it has been a wonderful blessing for me and has really helped to remind me of the importance of fellowship as well as daily personal devotions.

Which brings me to what I hope to gain from The Bible in a Year - and Beyond! --   I want to get to know God better and work diligently at spending time with Him on a daily basis, or as close to daily as possible, so that it becomes such a regular part of my day that I'd miss it if I didn't do it.  I am very familiar with the traditional Bible stories, but now that I'm older and have more and different experiences in my life I'm seeing things in them that I never saw before.  Also, there are portions of the Bible I've never read, so I'm looking forward to finding out what I've been missing.  I look forward, also, to reading your comments and thoughts on the Scriptures we're reading and learning from all of you as well. 

Sorry if this is long... I tried to be as concise as possible.  If there are things I wasn't clear about or that you want to ask me about, please feel free.

6 comments:

Nicole said...

Thanks for sharing Miriam. So glad that you found your way back to where you are meant to be :D God bless you as you grow closer to God and be a great example to your children.

tammi said...

You're totally the Miriam I thought you were! I've been wondering for some time, but you just confirmed it with the 'family moving to Germany when you were in your late teens' part. Remember me from Morrow? ;)

Miriam said...

YES! Wow, I knew you looked familiar - I can't believe I didn't put it together!

Kristi said...

Thank you for sharing Miriam. It can be so hard to venture out on you own and find a church. It took us a long and exhausting search when we moved to Georgia to find the church we finally joined here. I do pray that you are where God wants you to be and I pray your husband will one day share the desire that you have to be close to the Lord!

Tammy said...

I still think it's cool that both of us (and Dave R) decided to go on Teen Missions the same summer without even talking to each other about it!

Your testimony is another wonderful example of God's faithfulness. We may wander, or distance ourselves from God, but He will never leave us.

That's neat about finding your church that way!

I will pray that your husband will become a Christian too one day.

Thanks for sharing with us Miriam.

Miriam said...

It is really cool that we all went that summer, even though we all went on different trips. It was one of, if not the, biggest learning experiences of my life, spiritually especially, but otherwise as well.

Thanks for your prayers. I find it difficult to talk about God with my husband, as we've been together for so long already and I don't want him to feel like I'm suddenly starting to preach at him or something. I know that he's noticed how regularly we're going to church now, but I think he kind of looks forward to that as a nice quiet Sunday morning to himself, so that doesn't really influence him to join us!